


Centuries of Happiness

by xuhannie



Series: Just Us (Stray Kids) [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Aromantic, Asexual Character, Friendship, Han Jisung | Han is Oblivious, Han Jisung | Han is Whipped, M/M, Minor Bang Chan/Kim Woojin, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-26 23:12:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17755292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xuhannie/pseuds/xuhannie
Summary: Jisung finds himself drawn to the older boy and feels frustrated not knowing why he so badly wants to be the reason for Minho's happiness.Just Jisung having feelings





	Centuries of Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> i didn't want to sleep so I'm here writing my feelings out because I'm still not sure if what I'm feeling is platonic or romantic  
> also the 9th was released and i read too many minsung aus  
> warning : none of this was beta read n i wrote this in a tiny phone in the dark at 12am for 3 nights
> 
> title taken from Small Things by 3racha

     All nine members of Stray Kids had completed filming at an amusement park for their fourth season of 'The 9th' and Jisung just like any other day was enjoying his time with his members. 

     Except for the fact that he starts to think about what kind of relationship he has with Minho.

     Everyone had just returned from filming and were too worn out to strike up a conversation with each other. They made a silent agreement on to who would wash up first as Woojin entered the washroom while the others were either spread out on the floor or returned to their respective rooms. Jisung was the latter, he shut the door to the room he shared with hyunjin and seungmin and fell face first into his bed ( he would soon regret that later ).

       He rested in that position for a while until all of a sudden he was thinking about the trip they took together earlier. He twisted his body so that his back was on the bed and he faced the ceiling. Staring at the white spread above him with a blank expression, memories of the event washed over him.

    Him having the time of his life with his members wasn't a rare occurence so why would he think much about it? No, he realised he's not thinking about all 8 of his members but only one of them. 

    Lee Minho. The boy he's spent only less than 3 years with. And yet, he finds himself drawn to him like a magnetic force. They've joked around together plenty of times and their plays weren't anything out of the ordinary as he has done the same with the rest of the members.

     This only confuses Jisung as he starts to ponder over what kind of relationship he has with the older boy. Minho used to just be the trainee he saw as his competition in terms of visuals, now he's the close friend he enjoys teasing and the hyung he wants to see happy. 

   Jisung sat up from his position and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. Why is he suddenly being conscious of what he thinks of Minho? Usually the interviewers do this for them. Of course he wants to see him happy! Isn't that what everyone should wish for their friends? But why is he making this conscious decision of imagining the two of them going to a cat cafe together because he knows Minho loves cats and he knows he'll be smiling the whole day and it would be so much fuN-

    "You look weird hyung"

    Jisung, startled, whips his head towards the source of the voice and finds Seungmin standing at the door. 

    "W-What do you mean?"

    Seungmin raised one of his eyebrows in response that implied he wasn't going to believe Jisung didn't notice what he was doing. 

     "Your face was so scrunched together i almost couldn't recognise you"

     Seungmin ignored Jisung's retaliation and left the room after he took his clothes from the closet. 

     Jisung sagged down even lower until he was lying on the floor. His cheeks hurt. Was he smiling this whole time? He wasn't really sure of anything anymore. Does he like Minho?

      If all those romance dramas he's watched were accurate, he would have felt jealousy whenever Minho gets a bit too close to Chan, or maybe butterflies in his stomach when they playfully flirt.

      Jisung thinks hard to recall ever feeling that way and he can say with full confidence that no, he's never felt romantic feelings for Minho and the idea of dating him or anyone puts him off. Well not like he can exactly trust his head when it comes to romance since he's long identified himself as acearo. 

    The frustration got the better of him so he took his phone out from his pocket and entered "i like someone but i don't want to date them" into the search bar. He scrolled through the results and the most commonly found answer he got from google was that maybe JUST maybe he was infatuated with Minho and that it's short-lived. He felt unsatisfied reading the word 'short-lived' as he can't see himself not ever wanting to be the reason for Minho's happiness. However, he doesn't like the concept of dating either and can't see himself ever being beyond friends with Minho. He likes the way they are right now. 

   He would indefinitely be happier if he spent more time with him than he does now though. 

   With only one person in mind to consult with about his issue, he stood up and walked towards Chan's and Changbin's shared room. 

  3racha has always been the group of friends he feels comfortable talking with about anything and everything. It's not like he can keep a secret from them either, he doesn't have the heart to after all they've done for each other.

    Which brings Jisung to realise another thing, why does he feel so close to Minho like he is with his two hyungs even when they've never had sincere talks privately? They don't even know each others' personal life outside of stray kids and yet he feels safe around him.

    He knows he can trust Minho.

    Maybe it's because of the survival show they experienced together or maybe it's been like this all along. He didn't need to build anything with Minho on their relationship maybe because it's been there from the start. 

    He knocks the door to announce his presence before entering the room after pushing that thought aside. He sees their leader scribbling notes in his book alone in the room despite recently returning from work.

     Jisung is unfortunately not surprised at the scene. He takes in a deep breath before starting, except he can't start because he doesn't know where to begin. He realised this too late as Chan turns to face him from his desk. 

    "Anything you need Jisung?"

     He nervously gulped, he's worried of how Chan would react. He probably would assume he likes their own bandmate romantically hearing his story but he knows that's not the case. He's definitely not worried about Chan knowing he perhaps may have a crush on a person of the same gender. After all, Chan came out to the group a few months ago. He knows everyone's very accepting of the differences in the other members so really, that wasn't the problem. The problem now is that he was awkwardly staring at Chan, not able to say a word. 

    Chan somehow knew he wanted to tell him something serious since he had stored his book away and was turned so he was facing Jisung properly. 

    "You know you can tell me anything right? I won't judge you i promise" Chan gave that mother-like smile that never fails to comfort anyone. 

    "i know that" Jisung sighed in defeat and sat on the edge of Changbin's bed. His worry definitely showed on his face as Chan went to sit beside him. 

    They stayed in comfortable silence until finally, Jisung opened up about his situation. Taking another deep breath, he spilled everything. 

    "What if i find i trust this person with my whole heart and i want to spend every minute with them even if i don't know them as well as i want to, and yet i feel different around them compared to being with the others. I feel safe even if i don't talk to them abt personal issues like i do with hyung and Changbin hyung.

     However, i know i don't like the concept of dating. I dont even have much in common with them yet i want them to receive everything good in life? I can't ever imagine them being anything but good. Is this still platonic and aromantic?  This has been frying my brain for a bit and i need to get this question off my back. "

    Jisung looked over to his hyung to see him deep in thought, slowly soaking up the information that had surely caught him off guard. Chan took a while to respond and it caused Jisung to start regret ever telling his hyung. Bad bad decision. Why'd he think it was a good idea to talk about feelings during promotions? Not like this was important. He was about to stand up when Chan spoke,

    "So do you want to like..... kiss them? Or hold their hands?"

    Jisung fell back on Changbin's bed n released a sigh of relief he didn't know he was holding in.

    "Kissing is a bit too much... and i enjoy skinship in general"

    "How would you feel if they had a similar relationship with someone else then?"

    "Relationship? So far I've only told you about my feelings, i don't know what sort of relationship we have or if they even feel the same comfort i do with them", that had dampened Jisung's mood and it had him pouting.

    "Perhaps it's platonic?" Chan saw the immediate distaste hearing the answer. "Hey, I'm not always right, you don't have to listen to me. Find the answer that satisfies you best at your own pace. It's alright Jisung" Chan gave a reassuring smile and a pat on Jisung's shoulder as soon as he sat up to lean back on the wall.

      "Do you feel the same with Woojin like i do with them?" 

       Chan shot a glare at Jisung but still answered him, "Kind of? Except that i do have desire to date him" 

       "How about feeling butterflies in your stomach?" 

       "Butterflies- Oh, um well i suppose so" 

       Jisung hummed in response. He stood up, feeling the frustration seeping into his pores, swallowing him whole. This wasn't going anywhere. His feelings shouldn't be made such a big deal. All he did today was inconvenience his hyung. Maybe he just needs time to get over it. It's not like he intends to ever date Minho. This was pointless. 

   "Thanks hyung, i think I've sorted it out enough for now (a lie) " Jisung smiled and gave a tight hug to Chan. 

   "Anytime" They pulled back and Chan returned to his study desk as soon as the conversation was deemed finished.

    Jisung sighed at his hyung's antics. There was no saving the workaholic (totally not being a hypocrite). Turning away and walking into the living room, he hears his name being called. 

    "Jisungie!! It's your turn now" Minho shouts as he exits the bathroom with a towel hanging on his shoulder and sits down on the couch, phone in his hand. 

     Jisung grins and seizes the opportunity to bully his hyung by jumping on him, tainting his freshly cleaned body with his sweaty and smelly self. 

      They bicker and throw playful insults at each other (and towels) and they laugh at the destruction they've made in the short amount of time being together. 

      Suddenly, he wasn't frustrated and confused because at the moment, none of it mattered to him anymore  

 

**Author's Note:**

> i left it as ambiguous because nothing else happened to me after this unless keeping who it is from everyone but my gay friend is something  
> 


End file.
